(Article taken with thanks http://www.central-mosque.com/index.php/Relationships/welcoming-a-child.htm)
Birth of a child is one of the most joyous occasions for the family, friends and the loved ones as the little bundle of joy lifts up spirits and brings endless blessings and bliss to everyone concerned.
Birth of
a child is one of the most joyous occasions for the family, friends and
the loved ones as the little bundle of joy lifts up spirits and brings
endless blessings and bliss to everyone concerned. However it is a also a
time of great responsibility for the parents to ensure that the
injunctions in the Qur'aan & Sunnah are followed to ensure the
blessings of Allah (SWT) for the little bundle of joy and the whole
family.
Choosing the right partner:
Preparation for welcoming a child
actually begins before the birth. In Islam the man or the woman is
encouraged to take a "pious and practising" partner to ensure that their
attention remains focused on the life hereafter and on fostering and
strengthening their relationship with Allah (SWT). A man blessed with a
pious Muslimah as his life partner is told to be in possession of the
best of this world:
Sayyidina
Abdullah Ibn Amr (RA) reported Allah's Messenger (Sallaho Alaihe
Wassallam) as saying: The whole world is a provision, and the best
object of benefit of the world is the pious woman. [Muslim]
Furthermore a Muslim man is encouraged to marry Muslimahs who not only pious and practising but also loving and prolific.
Sayyidina
Ma'qil ibn Yasar (RA) narrated that a man came to the Prophet (Sallaho
Alaihe Wassallam) and said: I have found a woman of rank and beauty, but
she does not give birth to children. Should I marry her? He (Sallaho
Alaihe Wassallam) said: No. He came again to him, but he (Sallaho Alaihe
Wassallam) prohibited him. He came to him third time, and he (the
Prophet (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) ) said: Marry women who are loving
and very prolific, for I shall outnumber the peoples by you. [Abi Dawud]
Actions during Pregnancy and childbirth:
There are no specific duas or verses of
the Qur'aan to be recited during pregnancy or childbirth but in general
any Adhkaar, recitation of the Qur'aan can be adopted with abundant duas
for the well being of the mother and the baby. The mother should make
an intention that she will devote the baby for the Service of the Deen
of Allah (SWT) as per the dua of wife of Imran:
[3:35]
(Remember) when Imran's wife said: .O my Lord, I have vowed that what is
in my womb will be devoted exclusively for You. So, accept (it) from
me. You, certainly You, are the All-Hearing, the All-Knowing.
During the pangs of childbirth, certain
Ulamah have recommended Surah Yaseen (Chapter 36) and other Adhkaar to
ease childbirth (as incantations) and there is no prohibition in reciting them for the ease, comfort and consolation of the expectant mother.
First cry of the baby:
Generally, a baby will cry when its born
and this is due to the pricking of the Shaytaan. It is encouraged to
seek the protection of Allah (SWT) from Shaytaan (the Accursed) for the
child:
Sayyidina Abu
Huraira (RA) said, "The Prophet (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) said, 'No
child is born but that, Satan touches it when it is born where upon it
starts crying loudly because of being touched by Satan, except Mary and
her Son." Abu Huraira then said, "Recite, it you wish: "And I seek
Refuge with You (Allah) for her and her offspring from Satan, the
outcast." (3.36) [Bukhari]
Calling the Adhan in baby's right ear:
It is from the Sunnah to hold the baby and gently call the Adhan into the right ear.
Sayyidina Abu
Raafi' (RA) said, "I saw the Prophet (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) give the
adhaan for prayer in the ear of Hussain Ibn Ali (RA) after his mother
Sayyida Fatima (RA) gave birth to him," [Tirmidhi]
Iqamah in baby's left ear:
It is Mustahab (preferable) call the
Iqamah (for prayers) in the left ear of the baby. Although, the evidence
of this action is weak it has substantiation from the practise of early
Muslims and Al-Hafidh Ibn Qayyim (HA) also quotes this practise in
Tuhfat al-Mawdud bi-Ahkam al-Mawlud and lists 3 Ahadeeth (of varying
authenticity).
Tahneek for the baby:
It is from the Sunnah to then soften a
tiny piece of date or something sweet and to rub the lightly place it in
the mouth of the baby
Sayyia A'isha
(RA), the wife of the Apostle (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) said: Babies
were brought to the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) and he
blessed them, and after having chewed (something, e. g. dates or any
other sweet thing) he rubbed there with their soft palates. A baby was
brought to him and he passed water over him (over his garment), so he
asked water to be brought and sprinkled it, but he did not wash it.
[Muslim]
Giving the baby a good name:
The child will be called and identified
by his or her name not only in this lifetime but also in the hereafter
so it is of utmost importance that a good name is given:
Sayydina
Abu-Darda (RA) narrated that the Prophet (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam)
said: On the Day of Resurrection you will be called by your names and by
your father's names, so give yourselves good names. [Abi Dawud]
Any name with a good meaning is
permissible and it is not a requirement to give the child an Arabic name
but for boys it is recommended to give the names of Allah (SWT) or
names of the prophets.
Sayyidina Ibn
Umar (RA) reported that Allah's Messenger (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam)
said: The names dearest to Allah are 'Abdullah and 'Abd al-Rahman.
(Muslim)
Sayyidina Abu
Musa (RA) narrated :I got a son and I took him to the Prophet (Sallaho
Alaihe Wassallam) who named him Ibrahim, and put in his mouth the juice
of a date fruit (which be himself had chewed, and invoked for Allah's
blessing upon him, and then gave him back to me. He was the eldest son
of Abu Musa. [Muslim]
Giving a good name on the 7th day:
A child can be named on any day but it
is reported that Sayyidina Rasul-ullah (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) named
his grandchildren on the 7th day so Muslims are encouraged to follow
this noble practise and also name their child on the seventh day.
It was
reported that Sayyida 'Aa'ishah (RA) said: the Messenger of Allah
(Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) did 'aqeeqah for Hasan and Hussain on the
seventh day, and gave them their names. [Ibn Hiban, Hakim]
Aqeeqah on the 7th day:
Aqeeqah (sacrifice) is a noble Sunnah to remove harm from the baby.
Sayyidina
Salman bin 'Amir (RA) reported that Allaah's Messenger (Sallaho Alaihe
Wassallam) said: A 'qeeqah is prescribed for every child. Thus shed
blood on his behalf; and remove the harmful thing from him. [Tirmidhi]
It is also from the noble Sunnah to
sacrifice 2 animals for a boy and one animal for a girl on the 7th day
with the intention of Aqeeqah.
Sayyidah
'Aa'ishah (RA )reported that Allah's Messenger (Sallaho Alaihe
Wassallam) said: (The 'aqeeqah is) two [equivalent ] sheep for the male
child, and one for the female. [There is no harm whether they be male or
female animals.] [Ahmed]
Feasting and distributing Aqeeqah meat:
It is recommended for a person to feast
and also share the meat with family, friends and loved ones and also
distribute some of it to others.
Sayyidah
'Aa'ishah (RA) said concerning the meat of the 'aqeeqah: "It should be
cut into pieces, then eaten and given to others." [Ibn Abi Shaybah ]
It was narrated that Sayyidina Ibn Seereen
(RA) and Sayyidina Hasan al-Basri (RA) said: "Among them the 'aqeeqah
was dealt with like a sacrifice; some would be eaten and some given to
others." [Ibn Abi Shaybah ]
Shaving the head on the 7th day:
Then it is from the Sunnah to shave the head of the child and it is preferred to start the shaving from the right hand side.
Sayyidina Samurah ibn Jundub narrated :
The Prophet (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) said: A boy is in pledge for his
Aqiqah, Sacrifice is made for him on the seventh day, his head is shaved
and he is given name. [Abi Dawud]
Sayyidina Anas
ibn Malik (RA) reported that Allah's Messenger (Sallaho Alaihe
Wassallam) came to Mina; he went to the Jamra and threw pebbles at it,
after which he went to his lodging in Mina, and sacrificed the animal.
He then called for a barber and, turning his right side to him, let him
shave him; after which he tiimed his left side. He then gave (these
hair) to the people. [Muslim]
Giving the weight of the hair (in Silver) in Charity:
Charity equivalent to the weight of the baby' hair (in silver) should be distributed.
Sayyidina
Abu Raafi' (RA) reported: "When Faatimah (R) gave birth to Hasan (RA),
she asked Allaah's Messenger (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam), 'Shouldn't I
sacrifice blood (as 'aqeeqah) for my son?' He replied: No! Just shave
the hair of his head, and give sadaqah (charity) equivalent to its
weight in silver. She did that; and when al-Husayn was born, she did the
same." [Ahmed]
Circumcision:
It is from the noble Sunnah to
circumcise the boy but there is no set day or age for the procedure.
Whenever it is felt that the child is healthy enough, he should be
circumcised.
Sayyidina Abu
Huraira (RA) narrated: The Messenger of Allaah (Sallaho Alaihe
Wassallam) said: "The fitrah is five things, or five things are part of
the fitrah: circumcision, shaving the pubic hairs, plucking the armpit
hairs, clipping the nails and trimming the moustache." [Bukhari]
Islamic upbringing & looking after children
Bringing a child into this world is a
serious responsibility and Islam attributes great importance and value
to this noble cause. Parents are reminded of ensuring that the
upbringing of the child conforms of the tenants of Islamic Shariah and
warned of the consequences should they to slacken up in meeting their
obligations and fulfilling their responsibilities.
[66:6] O you who believe, save yourselves
and your families from a fire, the fuel of which is human beings and
stones, appointed on which are angels, stern and severe, who do not
disobey Allah in what He orders them, and do whatever they are ordered
to do.
It was
narrated from 'Sayydina Abd-Allaah (RA) that the Messenger of
Allaah (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) said: "Each of you is a shepherd and
is responsible for his flock. The ruler who is in charge of people is a
shepherd and is responsible for them. The man is the shepherd of his
household and is responsible for them. The woman is the shepherd of her
husband's house and child and is responsible for them. The slave is the
shepherd of his master's wealth and is responsible for it. Each of you
is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock." [Bukhari]
Giving good council and advice
Part of good parenting is to give good
advice and to steer the child in the right direction. This practise is
specially noted in the Qur'aan from Luqman (the wise) to his son:
[31:13] (Remember) when
Luqman said to his son, while he was advising him; My dear son, do not
ascribe partners to Allah. Indeed, ascribing partners to Allah (shirk)
is grave transgression.
[31:16] (Luqman went on saying to his
son,) .My dear son, in fact, if there be anything to the measure of a
grain of rye, and it be (hidden) in a rock or in the heavens or in the
earth, Allah will bring it forth. Surely, Allah is All-Fine, All-Aware.
Investment for the future
Rewards of good parenting are not
limited to the pride and joy felt knowing that parents have brought up a
find young man or woman and contributing member of the society, but
these rewards will continue to roll in even after the death of the
parents.
Sayyidina Abu
Huraira (RA) reported Allah's Messenger (Sallaho Alaihe Wassallam) as
saying: When a man dies, his acts come to an end, but three, recurring
charity, or knowledge (by which people) benefit, or a pious son, who
prays for him (for the deceased). [Muslim]
Spending on Children (family) is charity!
Parents are encouraged to spend on their
families and reminded of the immense reward of this expenditure in the
hereafter. The noble Sunnah teaches us to be kind to our children and
families to be spend on them to console them and make them feel happy.
Narrated
Sayyidina Abu Masud Al-Badri (RA): The Prophet (Sallaho Alaihe
Wassallam) said, "A man's spending on his family is a deed of charity."
[Bukhari]
Fair and equal treatment of children:
Young children are sensitive and Islam
teaches that the parents should be fair, equitable and just in treating
their children. Human feelings are sometimes beyond ones' control but
tangible actions should be well thought out and fair treatment of all
children should be ensured.
Sayyidina
'Amir (RA) narrated: I heard An-Nu'man bin Bashir on the pulpit saying,
"My father gave me a gift but 'Amra bint Rawaha (my mother) said that
she would not agree to it unless he made Allah's Apostle as a witness to
it. So, my father went to Allah's Apostle and said, 'I have given a
gift to my son from 'Amra bint Rawaha, but she ordered me to make you as
a witness to it, O Allah's Apostle!' Allah's Apostle asked, 'Have you
given (the like of it) to everyone of your sons?' He replied in the
negative. Allah's Apostle said, 'Be afraid of Allah, and be just to your
children.' My father then returned and took back his gift." [Bukhari]
Article taken with thanks http://www.central-mosque.com/index.php/Relationships/welcoming-a-child.html
